


the river always finds the sea

by neednoname



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Ambiguous Character Death, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, M/M, Mute Ferdinand, Mutual Pining, No knowledge of transistor is needed, Post-Canon, Pre-Relationship, Transistor AU, it's a spear husband!, of sorts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-07
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:33:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23528440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neednoname/pseuds/neednoname
Summary: The Emperor’s Shadow, he who swore to cut a path to Fódlan’s future, reduced to a mere weapon.The Prime Minister, the voice of Fódlan who guided its people, left without words.Hubert has always enjoyed irony but even he must consider this too cruel.
Relationships: Ferdinand von Aegir/Hubert von Vestra
Comments: 5
Kudos: 55





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Edit: [made a doodle for the spear's design](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f9259d4d5a6980d3966f0cffb32d7130/1a6431595084da1d-8a/s1280x1920/ad0cecc46ced158b1148d112d916db59169a4f9d.jpg)

“Ferdinand.”

A shiver ran down Ferdinand’s back as Hubert’s voice called to him. Closing his eyes, he could almost pretend the other man was standing at his side. Almost.

Ferdinand’s grip on the strange, twisted spear tightened as if Hubert would disappear if he let go.

He had been fascinated by weapons ever since he was a child and continued to collect them even now. He had seen countless works of numerous smiths, seen Relics and those blessed by the divine. But _this_ spear was like nothing he had ever seen before.

The closest he was reminded of was that odd spear Hubert had obtained near the war’s end but there were still stark differences. There was no trace of lightning magic. Instead the blade was covered in strange markings, encircling a large gem and Ferdinand could swear he could feel it pulsing under his touch.

Hubert mentioned some strange technology he had never heard of from an unknown enemy that Hubert, Edelgard and Professor Byleth had been fighting in secret for _years._ The very same who ambushed them earlier.

He had only invited Hubert for a quiet evening walk along Enbarr’s pier.

Ferdinand never dreamed it would end like _this._

(“You were never meant to become involved with _them_ ,” Hubert had snarled with such fury that it momentarily distracted Ferdinand from the whispers now trapped in his head.

Did Hubert think of him as someone who needed to be protected like a helpless damsel when they have survived an entire war or did Hubert not truly have faith in him despite all they have gone through and accomplished together--)

Ferdinand gazed at the destruction the two of them ( _two_ for Hubert was still here) left in their wake.

The same garbs as those who had ambushed them earlier but none of their weapons were out of the ordinary. The conjured black spikes that pierced their enemies along with the blade began to dissipate. Wisps of dark magic returned to the centre of the blade, to the jewel as black as a void, a void all consuming.

Yet it somehow glowed with each word Hubert’s voice spoke.

“That appears to be the last of them for now but that doesn’t mean your pursuers will give in. You need to keep moving.” A pause. “Your leg… are you injured?” With nothing else to focus on, it would be difficult not to pick up on the sound of Hubert’s restrained worry. To Ferdinand it was a relief. Hubert could still see. He was not trapped in the dark as well.

Forgetting himself, he tried to reply. _‘It is merely a scratch,’_ but no sound passed his lips. Reflexively Ferdinand reached for his throat.

But it felt fine.

With what fate had befallen Hubert and their relentless foes attempting to hunt them down, he did not have the opportunity to process what had happened to himself.

Whatever Hubert was saying faded to a background hum, masked by the growing cacophony of Ferdinand’s own mind.

What use is he now when Adrestia, when _Fódlan_ needed guidance now more than ever?

Unable to give orders on the battlefield if he is needed to protect what they have built. Never again to converse with his friends, to give his horses the praise they deserve, to sing the songs he loved--

He forced himself to calm down. He was being selfish. There were far more important matters at hand.

Finally, Ferdinand shook his head. He was fine.

“...Very well.”

There was the slightest waver in Hubert’s voice. He was as unnerved by this whole ordeal as Ferdinand was. Of course he was! It was Hubert, not Ferdinand, who had… who had--!

Ferdinand wanted to reassure him as Hubert had attempted to do so mere hours ago when Ferdinand could do nothing but silently sob as he clung desperately to what remained of the man he loved.

His hands could not stop trembling. Could Hubert feel them? Could he feel anything anymore?

He still could not get the image of Hubert’s chest being pierced by the very spear Ferdinand now held in his hands out of his mind. Hubert taking the blow meant for him.

The resignation in those pale green eyes was the last he saw of Hubert before the jewel lodged through the man’s heart burst and darkness shrouded them.

When Ferdinand next awoke, their attackers were gone. He had been warped somewhere far away.

Ferdinand was unable to speak.

And all that was left of Hubert was a voice trapped in that loathsome spear.

(“Not an ill-fitting form for the Emperor’s shadow,” Hubert had mused and Ferdinand could not even chastise him. 

Edelgard would never have wanted this. _He_ never wanted this.)

There were so many words he wanted to- should have told him! Words he had not spoken in fear of shattering this strange and marvelous bond they had built between them over so many years.

Words he now regretted never speaking.

He… he should have told Hubert how much he meant to him, a million times over until the both of them were sick of it--

Ferdinand wanted to hold him close and never let go!

But now…

No.

With no… corpse to determine what truly happened, it was still not certain this could not be fixed! If… if that spear had truly killed Hubert, then why was it not covered in his blood? There was still a glimpse of hope and Ferdinand refused to let go.

And while being silenced was… was an inconvenience, Ferdinand could still convey his thoughts through other means!

He changed his grip to hold the spear close, hands careful as if he had not used him to cut through a swath of enemies mere moments ago. He wrapped his arms around him tight, feeling the cold black jewel press against his forehead.

Ferdinand only damned himself for not having the courage to embrace Hubert sooner.

The sound of the other man’s sigh tore at his heart. “Ferdinand…”

A moment. He just needed a moment.

“You need to return to the palace.”

Ferdinand flinched at the idea. He wanted to argue no, they had to find their attackers! They had to find out what that spear was, what exactly it did to them. They had to find… had to find Hubert’s body.

But Hubert continued, voice stern. “The sooner you regroup with the others, the sooner you can fight back. You stand little chance by yourself.”

Always the logical one.

Ferdinand took a deep breath and nodded.

They will restore his partner’s form. They will get his own voice back.

And the moment they stand face to face once more, he will tell Hubert everything he had kept silent for so long.


	2. Chapter 2

Laughter echoed between the enclosed space, bouncing off the narrow walls and ringing in Ferdinand’s head.

There must be some irony of the Prime Minister hiding in a dark alleyway like a common thief, stained in gore and miasma. Exhausted and freezing, every muscle in Ferdinand’s body cried out for the need to rest. Sorrow that, although tempered by the need to focus on survival, lingered as a constant ache.

At every path the two had taken, _they_ had found them first. Even the routes Hubert had suggested, through places Ferdinand had not even known existed in Enbarr, resulted in a battle.

Despite the blade cutting through any obstacle with ease.

Despite Hubert’s own magic being infused and amplified with the spear’s inherent power.

Despite being able to wield Hubert’s strength as his own...

He was tired beyond belief. It was as if he had stormed an enemy’s base all by himself. If this was how it went regardless, Ferdinand regretted not ignoring Hubert and taking the charge to them. A rare summer rain that started after a few encounters with their attackers had appeared to be a stroke of luck in their favour, ensuring most of Enbarr’s citizens were off the streets and out of harm's way. But it seemed it did no good in covering their tracks. Every path they took to the palace was guarded by even more figures dressed in black.

And to his dismay, every time he had attempted to sneak past them, they were spotted immediately. But he was far from incapable, Ferdinand was certain of that! Why during the war he had managed to slip in and out of Fhirdiad undetected with ease! So why now…?

No. He could not linger too long on those thoughts. It was difficult enough to avoid becoming utterly surrounded without his mind being weighed down by doubt.

But there had been no sign of guards either, what had happened to the city’s watch? Could their enemies truly infiltrate so deep into the city without resistance?

How was the situation so dire yet Edelgard and Hubert did not even consider to inform him--?

(It was like seven years ago, when he was left utterly blindsided by Edelgard’s war, left vulnerable, without his title and wealth.

Not even a consideration in their plans.)

He knew of this district, populated primarily by smaller merchant houses but the streets themselves were unfamiliar to him. As much as he adored and considered the capital his home, Enbarr was the largest city in all of Fódlan. Hubert’s knowledge was one thing, after all he was the Emperor’s Spymaster, but their foes knew Enbarr just as intimately...

The weather had cleared within a few hours but it did nothing for Ferdinand’s sense of dread nor his soaked clothes.

Hubert had grown more and more quiet with every encounter but Ferdinand had hoped he was merely lost in thought and not--

Not somehow fading away.

Ferdinand was left with nothing but the silence of Enbarr’s empty streets and the roar of dark magic that consumed their enemies’ forms.

Until Hubert suddenly told him to stop. A large puddle stretched across a battered road and the city’s lanterns were bright enough to clearly see their reflection. A ragged, miserable, bloodstained shell of himself stared back at him.

After that Hubert completely fell silent.

No matter how long he waited, the voice did not speak. Panic had surged in his chest, choking at his wordless throat. Fear that something had happened without him realising, that Hubert was now well and truly...

They were getting no closer to the palace, to Edelgard and Professor Byleth, to any form of help--!

He needed a moment to rest.

Ferdinand ducked into an alleyway, beyond twisting corners until they reached a dead end. Finally Ferdinand let himself sit down with a groan, a reprieve for his aching leg. He had attempted to heal the cut that ran deep across his calve but the paladin was forced to admit that magic was far from his strong suit and his constant movement had not helped.

Still he was alert for any sound of footsteps. To be caught off guard and be forced to fight without the space needed to properly wield a lance would be a difficult situation to say the least.

As he caught his breath, Ferdinand let his fingers trail around the winding ridges of the spear that surrounded the dark jewel. His drenched hair weighed heavy on his shoulders.

He gave a tired glance at the weapon in his hands.

Ferdinand could not help but pray to the dead goddess he helped dethrone that Hubert would break his silence, that he would give him some sign - _any_ sign that he was still here.

He would end up regretting that.

The sudden laughter sent a shiver down his spine as the spear thrummed under his grasp.

The voice echoed off the enclosed walls and Ferdinand couldn’t help but be alarmed at the hint of hysteria.

Neither could he not stop thinking of the past sunset. A mere few hours ago Hubert had laughed with him unrestrained, his head thrown back, his lovely pale green eyes wrinkled in delight.

How Hubert had smiled at him.

Not a snide smirk but a genuinely affectionate smile, as his sharp face was lit up by the fading sun. How that mere expression had filled Ferdinand with such unbelievable warmth, only to be ripped away moments later--

At last the laughter died down.

“Ah… I see now,” Hubert murmured, bitterness choking the voice. Ferdinand stared at him. What else did he keep a secret from him?

“You need to leave the spear behind.”

Ferdinand almost dropped him.

 _‘What?! Why?’_ he spoke without meaning to. His hands trembled in fury, in fear, in betrayal--

“There is a certain sigil carved below the blade, I can't believe it took me this long to recall what it is… _they_ can hear everything in a certain proximity to the spear. Our enemy is listening to every word I speak.

Ferdinand, I’ve been leading them to you.”

Oh.

“Leave the spear behind,” Hubert repeated the heartless order again. “Their need to retrieve the spear would be enough to distract their efforts from finding you. I will lure them away. Get to safety, regroup with Lady Edelgard and eradicate those who slither in the dark in my stead.”

No, he couldn’t, he could never--

Ferdinand shook his head desperately, he refused to listen to this inane nonsense!

“Ferdinand--!” Hubert let out a _tch_ , clearly losing his patience. “Listen to reason, you need to do this before you end up dead as well!”

‘But you are still here,’ Ferdinand wanted to cry out. ‘Stop acting as if you are already dead!’

“There is no time,” Hubert growled. “Either they will kill you _and_ take their weapon back or I can give you this chance to escape!”

It was so rare to witness him lose his composure.

Ferdinand could barely manage to communicate, how would he be able to convince him to see reason now?

“I refuse to burden you any longer so allow me to do this for you. Please.”

Hubert von Vestra reduced to begging. Ferdinand never thought he would live to see the day.

So for the first time that night, he placed down the spear onto the wet stone ground. His hand grazed over the black jewel and light flickered under his touch.

Ferdinand stood up.

“Guide her well and… Ferdinand, I… For a long time now, I’ve--” Hubert cut himself off but Ferdinand refused to move until he finished. When he continued, his voice was quiet, barely more than whisper. “...I wish you luck.”

Ferdinand’s whole body was numb. He turned and did not look back.

As he stumbled out of the alley, he winced at the lights that lit the main streets. With the lamps shining bright on the stone road, he could see there was no one around. Ferdinand took a deep breath. He should have done this sooner. His heart hammered in his chest as he quickly made his way to the closest building.

He reached for the door. As his hand gripped the handle he tensed up, focusing. A familiar flash of green light appeared before him in the shape of his crest as a loud _crack_ echoed down the street, the door buckling and lock snapped.

Ferdinand’s gaze scanned across the shop. He grabbed what he needed from behind the shop’s counter and left, taking note of the address. After all, he needed to repay for damages once they made it through this night.

Returning to the dead end, it was somehow even darker than before, the moon now completely covered by thick clouds and rendering the area pitch black.

The contradictory glow that normally radiated from the spear’s gem was nowhere to be seen.

His heart stopped in his chest. Oh no, no no--

Did they steal him away so fast--?

A glimpse of moonlight peeked between the heavy clouds and he could make out the familiar silhouette of the spear. It was only then the glow of the jewel returned and Ferdinand could breathe again.

Hubert was still here.

“Ferdinand, why are you--” the furious voice was cut off and the gem flickered. “Where did you get that?”

Ferdinand glared at him, a finger over his lips. ‘Be quiet until I am done.’

He knelt down beside Hubert, placing his stolen goods on the ground. He spread the parchment against the rough stone floor and as the quill met paper, Ferdinand’s movements stilled.

Now that he finally had a way to talk to Hubert, he did not know what to say.

Ferdinand took a deep breath and forced his trembling hand to steady. He could scarcely see his own words but that did not matter.

‘ _Are you really here? Or am I just imagining your voice so I will not go mad with grief?_ ’

“What are you...? ...Yes, I am here.”

He wrote with a tight grip, not caring if he punctured holes through the paper.

‘ _Then if I was the one trapped in that spear, would you leave me behind?’_

“No. Never.” Hubert’s answer was immediate and warmth burst within Ferdinand’s chest.

He continued writing.

‘ _I_ _was their target, Hubert. Now that I know of their existence they would not simply let me go free after all this. And what of the spear’s power? Do you realise that letting youself fall into their grasp means that you will be used against the Empire? Against Edelgard?!_ ’

“I--!”

He once again put a finger over his lips. Let him finish first.

‘ _There is something I must tell you. But_ _only_ _once we are face to face. Understand?_ ’

“I… I understand.”

Ferdinand paused for a moment before continuing but then shook his head. Caution was more than wise but if there was an indication that his sight was compromised as well then Hubert would have mentioned it by now.

‘ _We will continue to head back to the palace and I will figure out a path without your assistance. But I promise you this, Hubert. You will never fall to their grasp._ ’

Hubert let out a scoff. “You can’t possibly be sure of that.”

‘ _I can. We will survive this night. Together._ ’

Hubert fell quiet for a very long time.

At last he let out a sigh. “Very well. I’m with you,” Hubert whispered.

For the first time that night, Ferdinand felt himself smile. That was all he needed to hear.

Swiftly he corked the ink bottle and crammed everything into his coat’s pocket. Knowing his fortune of the past few hours, it was likely that it would break and stain both the parchment and his clothes a thick black but he lost the energy to care so long ago.

Ferdinand picked up the spear once more. The weight was becoming so familiar to him despite the short amount of time.

He brought him close and pressed his forehead against the cool jewel. As Hubert let out another sigh, Ferdinand allowed himself to relax as another thrum radiated from him.

He had so many more questions he wanted to ask Hubert. Who exactly was their enemy? How did they attain the power to tear a person out of their body and for what purpose?

But for now, he had enough of this damp alleyway.

The two of them will survive this night, no matter how many enemies they must cut down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> probably won't be writing any more chapters for this but eh who knows

**Author's Note:**

> (not gonna lie, i had mitski's nobody stuck in my head while writing this)  
> this is gonna remain a one-shot because i'm bad at finishing stuff and transistor makes me feel sad lol


End file.
